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Funny quotes

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.

Robert Frost quotes


Love is like racing across the frozen tundra on a snowmobile which flips over, trapping you underneath. At night, the ice-weasels come.

Matt Groening quotes


Love is a piano dropped from a fourth story window, and you were in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Ani Difranco quotes


I never thrust my nose into other men's porridge. It is no bread and butter of mine: Every man for himself and God for us all.

Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra quotes


Life is one fool thing after another whereas love is two fool things after each other.

Oscar Wilde quotes


Men always want to be a womans first love - women like to be a mans last romance.

Oscar Wilde quotes


The shoe that fits one person pinches another; there is no recipe for living that suits all cases.

Carl Gustav Jung quotes


He that waits upon a fortune, is never sure of a dinner.

Benjamin Franklin quotes


If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening, be patient. It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear.

Winnie the Pooh quotes


I never resist temptation, because I have found that things that are bad for me do not tempt me.

George Bernard Shaw quotes


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