I asked God for strength, that I might achieve, I was made weak, that I might learn humbly to obey ... I asked for health, that I might do greater things, I was given infirmity, that I might do better things ... I asked for riches, that I might be happy, I was given poverty, that I might be wise ... I asked for power, that I might have the praise of men, I was given weakness, that I might feel the need of God ... I asked for all things, that I might enjoy life, I was given life, that I might enjoy all things ... I got nothing that I asked for, but everything I had hoped for. Almost despite myself, my unspoken prayers were answered. I am among all men, most richly blessed. Live everyday as though it's your last 'cause one day you'll be right. But I am foiled always with an instant turn-off: everyone I start to get a crush on...smokes. I was changing physically, mentally, emotionally, socially. And I was depressed a lot. A lot of the problems teenagers go through. It's better for them to go through them on their own. If you always have a crutch, you don't learn anything. My junior and senior years were a lot better, because I was more comfortable with myself. How much piecin' a quilt's like livin a life...The Lord sends us the pieces, but we can cut 'em out and put 'em together pretty much to suit ourselves... Every time I think of it I pinch myself 'cause I don't believe it's true, that someone like you loves me too. Go away, I’m trying to die...because I’m tired of the world, & the world is evidenly tired of me...Why? Because it’s all logic & reason now, science, progress, laws of hydraulics, laws of social dynamics, laws of this that & the other. No place for 3-legged cyclops from the south seas, no place for cucumber trees and oceans of wine. No place for me. I’ve just been expelled from a state of bliss & it’s all your fault. It was a dream, not a nightmare, a beautiful dream I could never imagine in a thousand nods. There was a girl next to me who wasn't beautiful until she smiled and I felt that smile come at me in heat waves following, soaking through my body and out my finger tips in shafts of color and I knew somewhere in the world, somewhere, that there was love for me. Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with those who are reckless with yours. If every word I said could make you laugh, I'd talk forever... |
